I know, hope did die at last
Sadness, sadness, world drowning sadness.
I am so in love with you, even in my sadness,
I know your mind is somewhere else completely.
Last glimmer of hope died in a burst of light
Like an explosion and only darkness of eternal night remains.
I am so in love, in so much pain and sadness.
You probably don’t remember when I said
“Make-up sex always works”
You laughed and found it funny
But even then you said all hope was gone
And I was already at the end of my wits.
I dream of make-up sex and all the love
That I would give you
In such a hope-bestowing night…
Or did it die? It does not want to
It’s a dreamer and believer in miracles,
That hope,
It’s all dead, my friend, she moved on
Your heart is still connected to a friend
Who you will, forever, miss.
She lives on, the way she was and what she felt for you
Inside your heart only.
You’ll keep her there, alive, forever.
It was the most beautiful thing, the most amazing thing,
It was so wondrously magically unique.
I love her so much.
Forbidden love, forsaken love.
And all those little things that I adore about her
They shine from afar, like long lost treasure.
Reminding me of what could have been.
Of peace and happiness.
That we will never see again.
Sadness.
Right now, she could be thinking of me -
Most likely not.
Right now, she could be missing me -
Most likely not.
I dream of her longing for what we had,
And catch myself looking at my own sadness,
And the mirages that it spurs inside my heart.
Pathetic.
She is gone, living another life.
Her heart focused on others,
Her mind busy about other things,
Her memory of us faint and dying.
Replaced by other things.
Newer, beautiful, and fresher things.
It’s only I who is left clinging
To a story that blew us away
And left me alone.
Sadness.
If we were to meet, and kiss, and re-connect,
Ever again - I think it would be
A life altering event.
Nothing would ever be the same again.
Or did it die?
Who will make your milk shakes?
Who will buy you flowers?
Who will cook for you?
Who will light candles for you?
Who will buy you spontaneous gifts?
Who will hold you all night?
Who will treat you better than himself - until his pain hurt you the most
Sadness
Who will kiss you when the gods are chanting?
Who will accelerate you until your smile becomes eternal?
Who will help you with your water bottles?
Who will take beautiful pictures of you?
Who will look at you and say “I love you”
A million times in his mind - without ever uttering a word.
Sadness
I wish it had ended differently,
I wish it had never ended.
Who will go for a walk with you
Who will say “Honey, I am home”.
Who will discuss birth charts with you,
Who will buy you ice cream and give you the better half.
Who will stand still and watch the stars with you?
Who will take you places like the proudest man on Earth.
Who will love your voice like it is the first and last thing he wants to hear?
Lennart,
You have to let her go.
I know. I know.
Maybe. Maybe one day.
Maybe one day.
You have to let her go for now.
But I miss her so much.
I love her so much.
I know.
There might be moments in which she misses you too…
It is dark, I am sitting alone
Eating a little dish I cooked,
In the place we sat together
So many nights
I have to distract myself
From my love for you
But know,
That I miss you very much.
Maybe one day, you’ll read these lines,
Then please know, that I love you so much,
It brings tears to my eyes.
You were my light,
You were my love,
You were my star,
You were my meaning
For almost a full quarter orbit.
I’ll miss you, love.
I miss whispering
Anyutochka
Before falling asleep
Next to you.
by Lennart